Tag Archives: life

Giving Back

I hesitate, my instincts too far beyond my surroundings

Alert, in tune with my heartbeat and the earths warnings

Now I must stop and seek cover from what I fear

Not cowering, not hiding, but living on the edge of finality it’s clear

Trust is the luxury of believers, I’m not a believer anymore, I’m here

Somewhere between safe and sound, I can no longer wander

It serves me well to stay in the shadows, alert and alive

I don’t need the lie anymore. I know under that beautiful garden there’s violence and decay, things we know, but don’t speak of

Don’t sell me assurances you can’t provide, I’m safe alone

I’m tired of all these people I have to be just to make your world complete

It’s been so long you don’t know which one is me, because you fell, fell into the trap and got ensnared in the one that you could never be for more than a moment

I was hear all along watching you melt under the light of an abstract dream. It was warm for a moment, but only the sun can bring true light, true warmth. The others just illuminated what they wish you to see, what they want you to be

Now your not human, not a person, but a part of something so much bigger than you that you can’t see it’s nothing, you’re nothing. You’ve been put to sleep in someone else’s dream.

Not I. I am wild, but free. I feel the heat of the day and shiver in darkness under the moons glow dreaming of sunrises.

What good is a sunset anyway. The end of a day shouldn’t be honored, it should be remembered. Where did we learn to worship the end of anything, it’s beginnings that have hope. All we have in sunsets are reflections and regrets

So I’ll keep your smile and give you back your watch. I’ll keep the sound of your voice, but give you back your words. You’ll need your hands, so I’ll leave with your touch gently caressing my heart. Everything else belonged to the world anyway.

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Dust

Dust dances through the attic within shards of light slowly passing time along well worn planks. It’s magic they seek in the eyes of the beholder. They have no fairies or ghosts without the fertile or feeble minds staring in wonder.

Creeks and whistles play staccato games with swaying trees just beyond the pain. But this is a space of remembrance. A place where memories are free to roam through cob webs and yellowed paper.

Slowly I run my hand along wooden chests and metal straps. My mind travels along colorless photos of perfectly groomed alabaster faces wearing oversized suits and cinched dresses. I wonder how long it took these memories to arrive in my hands, in my mind, are they even mine.

I smell the struggle to open these boxes of yesterday. Places and moments are separate in the still morning light. Every box opens with a sigh and closes with a question. Is this real, was that then, or is this some cruel reminder of how distorted time really is. Minutes and hours are easy. Days and nights are bearable because tomorrow still exists. Past this yellow fades white, laughter sounds distant, and feeling is a remembrance or dream.

But I have what’s left of my memories in a box, that’s fortunate. I have captured time, or has it captured me, sometimes I wonder. What my hands can’t grasp my mind helps along. As the dust dances on in the light of a new day I’ll become the memory. A blessing and the curse of a life long lived.

Artificial Existence

Artificial ignorance, is artificial intelligence an oxymoron? This creation based reality that is being advanced by the progressive movement hasn’t changed in 100 years, and we still have to listen to the ignorance.

This rote life form can be admired and armed to the point everyone is “blown away”! What makes it interesting is that in its simplest term, these forms can be shut down in seconds, it takes years to shut a human down. This basic fact has to be ignored to perpetuate the artificial truth that you can create real life outside the womb, unless you redefine life.

A latent effect for the average person is we begin to quantify life. The same folks who progressively portray themselves as humanist are the ones who developed this concept to establish the paradigm shift. Now the conversation is open to dividing up a populace. We can quantify woman, children, or babies. We can Label illegals, criminals, or addicts. We can bolster the belief in class and entrench masses in associative values. We could even quantify the fetus and each trimester and assign levels of humanness, ignoring the fact this is the origin of ignorance.

Now we come up with a right to life or woman’s choice slogans that serve to falsely elevate the gender gap. They throw in divisive terms like patriarch or matriarchal as if there’s a division. This is how they quantify the process of procreation. Divide the male and female ability to procreate. Then add artificial genders to confuse the possibilities. Then it becomes archaic to consider a man and a woman and the power of creation. Now it’s far fetched to think a man and a woman can create a family that can change the world. This is the America they want to eliminate. This is a hidden pillar of socialism that is masked by the scrim of deceit.

This is possible more and more because much of what was fantasy 100 years ago, is a reality today. The roots of ignorance run deep. These ideas and supporting terms were written and discussed years ago, there were many academics with political intuition who saw this and outlined the foundation of today’s progressive movement.

Keep I’m mind I’m speaking about one aspect of the progressive movement. Also keep in mind that most of the folks following this movement don’t understand the value of the compartmentalized nature of the ideology that influence their beliefs. For most it’s as simple as having a choice is better than not having a choice, being free within a society or culture is a right. We can even take our ability to create artificial existences and extend that to the natural order. All we had to do is attack every part of the process by creating a dichotomy within conception, gestation, and maturation. Then quantify the individual processes and soon the arrogance of the artificial intelligence fallacy has fled believing they can exercise that power over the natural order, which is demonized.

But why go to these lengths? Why divide the world against itself to unify it against itself. Chaos. Within this chaos created by ignorance leaders will arise who can gain control of the process and guide the fractionalized pieces together towards a unified ignorance till it looks like an early Picasso.

Listen to what’s being said nationally. Socialism can be a better system if we add “democratic” as a prefix. This was apparent in our last election when an elitist dressed as a common man espousing socialist ideals of shared wealth, except his. The “old man”, with his tweed jackets and grey hair, was a product of a generation heavily influenced by characters, not reality. Living proof that egocentrism isn’t confined to early childhood when you’re wealthy or privileged.

There are many other aspects of this movement and it’s ignorance that the same rubric is used to keep folks following this ignorance. I won’t waste time since the rubric is obvious. In it’s simplest form it’s the kid who is different justifying his difference by starting an argument between his two buddies to gain control of how each of them view the other. All the while remaining invisibly in control of the whole discord; until the other two boys grow up of course, then they hopefully whip his ass.

The truth is we’re about as free as you can be if you chose to live as part of a society, culture, or family. We have to sacrifice part of our freedom to be a part of any group. Even living life within one of the artificial existences requires you to give up part of who you are. Maybe that’s where the term “keep it real” came from, some sort of cry for freedom from artificial arrogance.

A Brush With Life

If pictures can paint a thousand words, our words can paint a million pictures, so speak your mind carefully. Remember that your heart and mind beat as one in a delicate balance.

The art of life is free within the confines of our physical world, but our thought, our dreams, are a world without boundaries. A gallery of wonder revealed within every vessel of hope. Create with your mind and paint your spirit with the rainbow of light.

Death looms for most, a release for a few, and a new beginning for others. The patina of time glimmers on fading memories like water colors running on canvas. A landscape of light melding into a blur of colors washing what was coherent. This is why the light within the tunnel is surrounded by darkness, we become the color.

Be your own portrait, don’t be painted by time or circumstance. Everyone’s an artist. Some with their hands, others with their minds. The difference in the medium is irrelevant, it’s the one who choses their brush carefully and let’s their heart move their hands that creates beauty.

Moments of Naïveté

I’m running through my life like scenes on a slide projector. I pause at the beauty of the rolling green fields surrounded by hedgerows and forest. Light shards bisect my path like narrow gorges of hope falling into an illuminated abyss of joy

Everything stops but my breath rolling like thunder beneath beads of sweat. I stand transfixed at the possibilities of love and fear embracing in a twisted affair of the heart that strangles the minds ability to discern good and evil.

The air is thick and humid with indecision as I realize it’s time to move on. The beauty of the moment has passed and now I smell the pungent grass and the rancid decay of insect infected stumps rotting unnoticed. The world feeds on unseen horrors.

Then a gentle breeze turns my sweat to a film of past glories. Yesterday’s love and conquest become the wind at my back gently encouraging my efforts to move towards a life of bliss in a world of storms. There are no good or bad, just life to live and enjoy.

I no longer stop at the site of a beautiful moment, but pause and smile and keep moving with the naïveté of youth. Life is to be lived, not observed, and the only way to enjoy this world is to know beauty when you see it, then leave it as it is for others to ignore.

Hello can be as enthralling as the stream falling in bends and turns through a moss covered gorge. It’s the aura of the moment that captures the spirit of humanity to halt or move our hearts to a rhythm that only love can flow.

Emotions

Rainbow
Of emotion
Within our hearts and minds
Waiting to complete who we are
Human

Static particles
Horizons flashing white
Calm replaced with storms

To see beyond the air is dark
Words reveal what’s hidden and stark

Fog is not an emotion
It just wet air you see
For when you look beyond the myst
It’s possible you’ll see

Sun scorched thoughts wave in the distance mocking my vision. Is it heat that gives the horizon consideration. All the while my mind rests inside my brain waiting for a summer breeze. It’s the line between elemental and ephemeral; pause.

No rest for the weary
Who idly sit
Engrossed in the query

The sun shines yellow and high
Begging for smiles
And wonderful days

It’s life you see, that is the day
Made up of moments
And emotions displayed

Lightning Strikes

Memories strike like lightning bolts full of anxiety leaving me frozen in time. You flash across my horizon in seconds I can’t see, but feel non the less. Each bolt rips a horizontal chasm in my reality as if within the streak of light is the other side of us.

Eyes dart inside my motionless body as the silence of something short of fear covers my thoughts like a blanket. Quietly I stare, like a noise or smell could change the trajectory of my life.

Is it hope or fear, or a wave of confusion. How did your memory become electric. Static and fluid chasing something short of dreams around my mind. You live within my hopes and fears now, like when you left.

You had till death do us part, I never had a divorce. Ill be married to you for ever. Together forever was your promise. You didn’t tell me it was your forever, without me, so now I stand here in the vacuum of us.

Memories aren’t dreams. Like panic isn’t fear. Together we created this sphere that spins within my soul, and now I awaken startled that anxiety is all I have left of us, but all storms pass and the memory of your smile still brightens my day.

So this is love and loss, memories and dreams, panic and fear. I struggle daily to not let this define us, and like a stormy day, the memory of your smile shines through to the other side of a new me.

I forgive you today, now that I understand you weren’t all that left. I understand you’re not coming back with the pieces of me you took. So now I fill those empty spaces with the pieces of you I kept, the good and the bad. But that’s life and loss, that’s us. A fragmented possibly of forever cut short by decades of if.